new year but same old obligations
It's the third day of the New Year already, but apparently nothing much has changed.
I keep preaching to people in an annoying way, asking them to listen to their hearts and do what they want to do. Instead of being binded to moral obligations, we should stand free and choose for ourselves, at least once in this lifetime. In spite of these wise words and encouraging pats I always give others, I hardly see myself doing the same.
I was born in a group think society, or rather, community to make it sound smaller. I am not that significant anyway. That's beside the point. The point is that ensuring social harmony and balance seemed more pivotal than expressing new and inquisitive ideas that might help improve situations. More importantly, we are restrained from being someone who bears the name that we were bestowed with by our parents. Everyone behaves and thinks similarly. Not because we were made the same, but because, if you attempt to ruin that staged cohesiveness, you will be branded as an outcast, or an outlaw for that matter, for trying to break the peace within that group.
I don't know about others, I know my family was raised that way. At least, my brother and I were. If you consider your life carefully, there are more than a dozen obligations you have to fulfil. It's tiring, to live under a person, to polish their boots until it shines and you can see your soul-forsaken face in it. So I tell people, to get rid of that polish cloth and start being a towkay in their own lives.
Then again, I myself is trapped within many moral obligations. And I highly doubt I will ever shake them off. It might be the genetic composition that I come with, or it might be the flawed and neglected upbringing that I went through, who knows? It's not important to find out the cause already, it's more important to know which direction to head.
In restrospect, I think I have been a good friend so far, I hope, at least. But if being a good friend to you is to take instructions in an obedient manner, then probably I got the definition wrong. I ruined a precious friendship once in 2003, and I hope I won't do it again.
I will hold on dearly to my cherished friends, I promise. In my own way.
New year, new beginnings, new expectations.
No wait, it isn't new. I am just picking up from where I left off.
On a side note, Happy birthday to Jane and John! Although I think they will never see this.
I keep preaching to people in an annoying way, asking them to listen to their hearts and do what they want to do. Instead of being binded to moral obligations, we should stand free and choose for ourselves, at least once in this lifetime. In spite of these wise words and encouraging pats I always give others, I hardly see myself doing the same.
I was born in a group think society, or rather, community to make it sound smaller. I am not that significant anyway. That's beside the point. The point is that ensuring social harmony and balance seemed more pivotal than expressing new and inquisitive ideas that might help improve situations. More importantly, we are restrained from being someone who bears the name that we were bestowed with by our parents. Everyone behaves and thinks similarly. Not because we were made the same, but because, if you attempt to ruin that staged cohesiveness, you will be branded as an outcast, or an outlaw for that matter, for trying to break the peace within that group.
I don't know about others, I know my family was raised that way. At least, my brother and I were. If you consider your life carefully, there are more than a dozen obligations you have to fulfil. It's tiring, to live under a person, to polish their boots until it shines and you can see your soul-forsaken face in it. So I tell people, to get rid of that polish cloth and start being a towkay in their own lives.
Then again, I myself is trapped within many moral obligations. And I highly doubt I will ever shake them off. It might be the genetic composition that I come with, or it might be the flawed and neglected upbringing that I went through, who knows? It's not important to find out the cause already, it's more important to know which direction to head.
In restrospect, I think I have been a good friend so far, I hope, at least. But if being a good friend to you is to take instructions in an obedient manner, then probably I got the definition wrong. I ruined a precious friendship once in 2003, and I hope I won't do it again.
I will hold on dearly to my cherished friends, I promise. In my own way.
New year, new beginnings, new expectations.
No wait, it isn't new. I am just picking up from where I left off.
On a side note, Happy birthday to Jane and John! Although I think they will never see this.
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