finished all the courses
Finally I finished all my courses for the year. Now I am back at my own unit and taking new trainees, which thereafter, I will ORD from there. Yeah.
Had been rather emotionally unstable the past week in camp. Just feeling moody and thinking a lot.. Trying to figure out the cause of it, but to no avail. I think probably its due to the fact that the 10th just passed.
Suddenly, I thought of a lot of things. I have been comparing myself with a lot of other people lately, maybe because I met many new people in the course. Somehow, I came to the conclusion that I am not as good as anyone of them. Seriously, I seemed to be able to find flaws in every aspects of myself. And of course, that made me even more depressed. Haha. I think I am easily disillusioned by little achievements. I think I need to keep on reminding myself that there is always someone better out there.. Somewhat, I do think too highly of myself at times, or rather, I don't want to be put down in front of others. I guess I am trying to hard to show myself.
Over the week, I read the papers. I realised that there are a lot of rape or molestation cases nowadays. There was one couple who was kidnapped and the female was forced to have 'fun' with the kidnappers in order to save her partner's life. And there is molestation of a lady at a children's playground, while on the other side of the land, there is a flasher who is a Captain in the army. I have also received e-mails regarding hypnotists that are cheating woman of their money or taking advantage of them in broad daylight in Orchard. Well, I won't know how true is that, but I won't put down any possibility of that. What is happening to the world out there? To all my female friends, please be careful when you are outside.
Over the week, I had an interesting lecturer. All of a sudden, he was talking about life and how some people are living it. What came up was this line: "Live within your means". To a certain degree, this phrase came as a wake-up call to me and got me thinking. Its quite true eh? Haha.. He talked about how people chased their dreams that seemed so impossible and end up with nothing. He talked about how come people ended up sad when they seemed like they got everything in the World. He talked about how life is all about satisfying needs. He talked about how people expect too much from the impossible. He talked about these points in just simple English, yet these questions seemed so foreign to me. Sometimes in life, I guess its just about what you want and how you satisfy those desires. Got you thinking eh?
Coming back to work, I went back yesterday to my own camp to put some of my stuffs. Well, apparently my 2IC has been going crazy and giving people 'extras' and punishment, as well as being anal in minor little stuffs. Looks like a tough period is waiting for me back there. In addition, I was brought to the news that I wasn't given any trainees under my charge this time round. I don't really know the reason nor can I figure it out, but it certainly dampened my spirits. I believe this shows how much I am valued in the office. Hmm. I hope I am thinking too much, but knowing that fact that I will be doing much of the other 'unwanted' workload as I have no one under me seriously puts me off. I can't imagine I have to go through what I went through last course. Haix. But at least the JC batch this time round seemed more obedient and willing to learn. Keeping my fingers crossed.
Well, tomorrow is Alvyn's birthday celebration. We have a surprise for him. Haha.. Even I am proud of the present.
At least there's one thing to be happy about: I've got wonderful and faithful 'sisters'.
Had been rather emotionally unstable the past week in camp. Just feeling moody and thinking a lot.. Trying to figure out the cause of it, but to no avail. I think probably its due to the fact that the 10th just passed.
Suddenly, I thought of a lot of things. I have been comparing myself with a lot of other people lately, maybe because I met many new people in the course. Somehow, I came to the conclusion that I am not as good as anyone of them. Seriously, I seemed to be able to find flaws in every aspects of myself. And of course, that made me even more depressed. Haha. I think I am easily disillusioned by little achievements. I think I need to keep on reminding myself that there is always someone better out there.. Somewhat, I do think too highly of myself at times, or rather, I don't want to be put down in front of others. I guess I am trying to hard to show myself.
Over the week, I read the papers. I realised that there are a lot of rape or molestation cases nowadays. There was one couple who was kidnapped and the female was forced to have 'fun' with the kidnappers in order to save her partner's life. And there is molestation of a lady at a children's playground, while on the other side of the land, there is a flasher who is a Captain in the army. I have also received e-mails regarding hypnotists that are cheating woman of their money or taking advantage of them in broad daylight in Orchard. Well, I won't know how true is that, but I won't put down any possibility of that. What is happening to the world out there? To all my female friends, please be careful when you are outside.
Over the week, I had an interesting lecturer. All of a sudden, he was talking about life and how some people are living it. What came up was this line: "Live within your means". To a certain degree, this phrase came as a wake-up call to me and got me thinking. Its quite true eh? Haha.. He talked about how people chased their dreams that seemed so impossible and end up with nothing. He talked about how come people ended up sad when they seemed like they got everything in the World. He talked about how life is all about satisfying needs. He talked about how people expect too much from the impossible. He talked about these points in just simple English, yet these questions seemed so foreign to me. Sometimes in life, I guess its just about what you want and how you satisfy those desires. Got you thinking eh?
Coming back to work, I went back yesterday to my own camp to put some of my stuffs. Well, apparently my 2IC has been going crazy and giving people 'extras' and punishment, as well as being anal in minor little stuffs. Looks like a tough period is waiting for me back there. In addition, I was brought to the news that I wasn't given any trainees under my charge this time round. I don't really know the reason nor can I figure it out, but it certainly dampened my spirits. I believe this shows how much I am valued in the office. Hmm. I hope I am thinking too much, but knowing that fact that I will be doing much of the other 'unwanted' workload as I have no one under me seriously puts me off. I can't imagine I have to go through what I went through last course. Haix. But at least the JC batch this time round seemed more obedient and willing to learn. Keeping my fingers crossed.
Well, tomorrow is Alvyn's birthday celebration. We have a surprise for him. Haha.. Even I am proud of the present.
At least there's one thing to be happy about: I've got wonderful and faithful 'sisters'.
Comments